Saturday, December 6, 2008

Some interesting facts about the EU (1)

Official logo of the treaty of Lisbon.

Initially a Franco-German agreement which, after realizing that neither could create an evil empire alone got together to create one together, it has evolved into the Geographical entity that ends at the eastern border of Greece, but includes Cyprus and Kurdistan. (Don't ask me, I wasn't invited when they were drawing the borders.) Cultural entity based on Christianity and has millions of Muslim members in and out of the geographical borders. (I told you not to ask me, didn't I?) Economic entity whose borders aren't yet specified. Or, if you don't like the definition until now, an international conspiracy giving away free money in return for:

a) money
b) a perfect looking silk Gucci scarf

The European Union (born 1992, will die 2010), also known as Großdeutschland, is the most magnificent organisation that has ever been created. Despite efforts of the Welsh ruining the genetic pool with their presence, it still looks strikingly beautiful for its age, which it attributes to drinking 1.5 liters of pure arctic water per day. On 1st of July of 2008, EU has become the empire, ruled by a big country, France (They have cruel intensions, especially with Americans and Turkey...)
With a respectable acting career, four enterprises and creating the entire Western Civilisation, it is currently enjoying a well deserved holiday in Helsinki. The European Union is also famous for its 1980s hit "The Final Countdown". After witnessing the downfall of the British Empire, the European Union felt sorry and offered a rather nice villa in the Ardèche region.
Allegedly, the EU is currently dating Asia after ending a 60 year long marriage with the USA. The divorce was a quite a struggle and their children (Canada, Falkland Islands and the Freemasons) are under treatment with Dr Phil and Oprah.
The EU's biggest fear is the increasing influence of teh internets haunting innocent European minds.

Key Data

The capital of the European Union is Brussels, although others say that it is The Hague or Strasbourg. Initially, Frankfurt was considered, but its inhabitants are too ugly and no longer live there. In reality, Brussel Sprouts is the capital, and Luxembourg is technically its bitch...too small to see.
The national dish of the EU is the Döner Kebab (grilled pieces of Chinese beef rolled into falafel, a typical EU bread). The ambassador is Hitler Shwarzennegger.

The Flag

The flag of the Union personifies its devotion to human rights. 27 State members, 12 stars??? At least Hitler gave ALL the Jews a star!!!! It has a blue-ish color, because the contrast with yellow is striking, and can be seen all over Europe especially on dumpsters (*see Spain), and near the member countries` most popular bar (*see Romania).

end of part 1

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